I forgot to order my meds...

As anyone who has a chronic illness will tell you, it's really hard to be on your "A game" with your disease all day and every day. I owe a lot of what I am able to do to my medications and this week I was reminded of that.

On Sunday, I was stuck in my head trying to get ready for this week with classes, a visit with my preceptor, a great opportunity with families and the Arthritis Foundation, integrating my training plan into my schedule, and keeping myself fueled, rested, fed, and sane! I noticed an alarm on my phone that it was time for my medications but when I went to the fridge to gather the syringes, I realized that I had forgotten to place my order. I knew this was bad news. I often like to think of arthritis flares as perfect storm of little things that need to come together; for every patient with RA it seems that it is different but for me it is lack of sleep, stress, and an inability to exercise.

After an intense workout weekend with a two hour bike ride and a 16 mile run, wouldn't you know it, my right ankle swelled up and began to give me trouble. I found myself not being able to flex it as I should and even having trouble while doing low impact things like biking and swimming. I knew I couldn't exercise and without exercise my stress levels from school started to slowly creep up and so before you knew it, I was in pain not just in my ankle but also my neck. I even started having a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, my sign that I need to take it easy. This week, it seemed, my arthritis was winning.

On my worst day pain wise, I was fortunate enough to interact and practice some new physical skills on a standardized patient who also had arthritis. I say fortunate because they reminded me that my personal struggles with arthritis will help me be able to relate to my patients and be an overall better physician. It also reminded me of why I personally wanted to be a physician in the first place. I am a big believer in mind over matter and sometimes it's little interaction like that which help bring me out of a rut. So this week, I was reminded that arthritis is a part of who I am..but I refuse to let it determine what I will do.